How to track your urges and find patterns (with just a pen and paper)

The first time I felt an urge and actually noticed it instead of just acting on it, something clicked. It wasn't dramatic. I didn't suddenly feel in control. But I saw it. I observed it happening in real time.

That moment of awareness? That's where change starts.

But here's the problem: urges are sneaky. They feel random. They feel like they come out of nowhere. One minute you're fine, the next minute you're spiraling. And when you're in the middle of it, it's impossible to see the bigger picture.

That's why tracking works. Not because writing things down magically fixes you. But because tracking builds the one thing you actually need: awareness.

When you track urges over time, patterns emerge. You start to see why they happen. You notice triggers. You recognize emotional states. You identify high-risk times of day. And suddenly, urges don't feel so random anymore.

Let me show you how to do this with nothing but a notebook and a pen.

Why Track at All?

Before we get into the how, let's talk about the why—because if you don't understand why this works, you won't stick with it.

Tracking creates distance between you and the urge. When an urge hits and you pause to write it down, you're inserting a moment of reflection between the impulse and the action. That pause is where your power lives.

Tracking reveals patterns you can't see in the moment. After a week or two of tracking, you'll notice things like: "I always get urges around 10pm" or "I'm triggered when I'm bored" or "I feel anxious before almost every urge." These patterns are invisible when you're living day-to-day, but once you see them on paper, you can plan around them.

Tracking proves that urges don't last forever. When you note the intensity of an urge and then check back 20 minutes later, you'll see it fade. Urges feel permanent in the moment, but they're not. Tracking gives you evidence of that.

What You'll Need

• A notebook or journal. It doesn't have to be fancy. A basic spiral notebook works fine. Just make sure it's small enough to keep with you.

• A pen. That's it.

• A commitment to honesty. This only works if you're real with yourself. No one else needs to see this data. It's just for you.

Step 1: Create Your Tracking Template

Open your notebook and set up a simple tracking template. You'll use this every time you feel an urge.

Here's what to include:

Date: _________  Time: _________

Intensity (1-10): ____

What triggered this?
- Bored
- Stressed
- Lonely
- Saw something online
- Tired
- Habit/routine
- Other: ____________

How was I feeling?
- Anxious
- Sad
- Frustrated
- Angry
- Numb
- Restless
- Other: ____________

Notes:

_________________________________

_________________________________

You can customize the triggers and emotions based on your experience, but keep it simple. You want this to be fast—30 seconds max—or you won't do it when an urge actually hits.

Step 2: Track Every Urge (Yes, Every One)

This is the hard part. When an urge hits, your brain is screaming at you to act on it. The last thing you want to do is pause and write in a notebook.

Do it anyway.

Here's how:

1. Notice the urge. The moment you feel it, name it: "I'm having an urge."

2. Grab your notebook. Physically get it out. This simple action interrupts the impulse.

3. Fill out your template. Rate the intensity. Circle the triggers. Circle the emotions. Add any notes if something specific happened.

4. Close the notebook. You're done. That's it.

The magic isn't in what you write. The magic is in the act of pausing. You just created space between the urge and the action. And in that space, you have a choice.

Step 3: Track for at Least a Week

One day of tracking tells you nothing. One week starts to tell a story.

Track for at least 7 days. Ideally 2-3 weeks. The more data you have, the clearer the patterns become.

During this time, don't judge yourself. Don't try to "fix" anything. Just observe and record. Think of yourself as a scientist gathering data. Curiosity, not criticism.

Step 4: Review Your Data and Look for Patterns

After a week or two, sit down with your notebook and read through your entries. You're looking for patterns.

Common patterns to look for:

Pattern 1: Top Triggers

Go through your entries and count how often each trigger appears. You'll probably find one or two that show up way more than the others.

For example, you might notice:

• "Bored" appeared in 60% of my entries

• "Saw something online" appeared in 40%

• "Stressed" appeared in 30%

This is gold. Your #1 trigger is your #1 thing to plan for.

Pattern 2: Emotional States

Do the same thing with emotions. What are you feeling most often before urges?

Maybe you notice:

• "Anxious" shows up in 50% of entries

• "Lonely" shows up in 35%

• "Numb" shows up in 25%

Now you know: urges aren't random. They're connected to specific emotional states. And emotional states can be managed.

Pattern 3: Time of Day

Look at what time you recorded each urge. Do they cluster at certain times?

Common patterns:

• Late night (10pm-midnight) when you're alone

• Mid-afternoon (2pm-4pm) when you're bored at work

• Early morning (6am-8am) before the day starts

Once you know your high-risk times, you can build routines and safeguards around them.

Pattern 4: Intensity Levels

Notice if certain triggers or times of day correspond with higher intensity urges. Maybe urges at night are consistently 8-9/10, while afternoon urges are 4-5/10.

This helps you prioritize. High-intensity situations need stronger coping strategies.

Step 5: Build Awareness and Plan Ahead

Now comes the powerful part: using your patterns to plan ahead.

Let's say you discovered these patterns:

• Your #1 trigger is "bored"

• Your #1 emotion is "anxious"

• Your high-risk time is 10pm-midnight

• Average intensity is 7/10

Here's how you'd use that:

1. Plan for boredom. Keep a list of engaging activities ready. When you feel bored, you have options that aren't scrolling or acting out.

2. Address the anxiety. Maybe you need a breathing exercise. Maybe you need to talk to someone. Maybe you need to journal. But now you know anxiety precedes urges, so you can intervene earlier.

3. Protect the 10pm-midnight window. Don't have your phone in your bedroom. Have a wind-down routine. Plan to be doing something specific during that time.

4. Prepare for intensity. A 7/10 urge is strong. You can't just "think positive" through it. You need real tools: the urge surfing technique, a 2-minute breathing exercise, texting an accountability partner, going for a walk.

The Secret: It's Not About Perfection

Here's what people get wrong about tracking: they think it's about never having urges. It's not.

Tracking is about noticing urges. Building awareness. Understanding the why behind them. And creating space to choose differently.

Some days you'll track the urge and still act on it. That's okay. You still gathered data. You still practiced awareness. You're still building the skill.

Recovery isn't linear. But awareness compounds. The more you track, the more you see. The more you see, the more choices you have.

A Note on Consistency

The hardest part of manual tracking? Actually doing it consistently.

Life gets busy. You forget your notebook. An urge hits when you're out and about. You feel too ashamed to write it down. You tell yourself "I'll remember this one and write it later" (you won't).

Here are some tips to stay consistent:

• Keep your notebook accessible. In your bag, by your bed, on your desk.

• Set a daily reminder. Not to track urges (those are unpredictable), but to review your tracking and remind yourself why you're doing this.

• Don't let gaps stop you. If you miss a day or a week, just start again. The data still helps.

• Track the small urges too. Even if it's just a 2/10, write it down. Small urges reveal patterns just like big ones.

What Comes Next

After 2-3 weeks of tracking, you'll have powerful insights into your patterns. But insights alone don't create change, action does.

Use your patterns to:

• Build safeguards around high-risk times

• Develop coping strategies for your top triggers and emotions

• Create accountability with someone you trust

• Practice mindfulness to catch urges earlier

• Celebrate progress when you notice an urge and don't act on it

And remember: every urge you notice and track is a win. You're building awareness. You're creating distance. You're choosing to show up for yourself.

That's the real work.

Or, You Could Let an App Do the Heavy Lifting

Look, if you made it this far, you're serious about this. And that's awesome.

But let's be real: manually tracking with pen and paper works, but it's hard. It requires discipline. You have to design your own template. You have to manually count triggers. You have to remember to do it every single time.

And when an urge hits, the last thing you want to do is pull out a notebook and start writing.

That's why we built NØRA.

NØRA does everything I just described but with less effort.

• Track urges in seconds with a guided, beautiful interface (no notebook required)

• Automatic pattern detection shows you your top triggers, emotions, and high-risk times without manually counting anything

• Real-time insights appear after just 5 entries. You don't have to wait 2 weeks and manually analyze data

• Gentle reminders help you stay consistent without relying on willpower alone

• Instant support when you need it: talk to NØRA, start a 90-second urge surfing timer, or do a 2-minute breathing exercise all in the same place

The pen-and-paper method works. But NØRA makes it 10x easier to actually stick with it.

If you're ready to stop white-knuckling your way through recovery and start building real awareness with less friction, try NØRA.

Your patterns are waiting to be discovered. Let's make it easy.